


Willkommen

by ab2fsycho (orphan_account)



Series: Singles [1]
Category: Book of Life (2014), Gravity Falls, Layton Kyouju Series | Professor Layton Series, Portal (Video Game), Rise of the Guardians (2012), Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, domestic AU, singles apartments
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-14
Updated: 2014-11-14
Packaged: 2018-02-25 09:39:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2617199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/ab2fsycho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dipper is moving into a new place and meets a myriad of strange new people.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Willkommen

The apartment complex was relatively small, which Dipper didn't mind. He didn't have much to bring along, and didn't need much space to live. He already missed his sister, but was looking forward to starting college and rooming with Wendy in the complex.

He pushed the button that would allow him access and was startled by the voice that greeted him. It was a deep, unpleasant voice that asked, “Who is it?”

Dipper was a little frightened to answer. It sounded like he was buzzing into Death's apartment complex. “I'm, uh, Dipper Pines. New tenant?” he hoped he didn't sound too disconcerted.

The voice seemed louder this time. “What room?”

Oh God, he didn't remember. Suddenly he'd forgotten. “I'm r-rooming with Wendy Corduroy.”

“Number pl—,” the voice was cut off by a higher pitched one spewing a string of words that were not English. Was that Spanish? It sounded Spanish. The next thing he knew, he was being greeted by a much softer, feminine voice. “Come in, Dipper.” Before she hung up, he caught another string of words. He was a bit rusty on Spanish, but he was fairly certain hijo de perra meant son of a bitch. The door unlatched and he was a little frightened to go inside now. Gulping, he pushed the door open and stepped inside.

He was greeted by a young Hispanic woman with open arms. She was taller than him, and she wore thick, blue eye shadow. She said happily, “It is good to finally meet you. Wendy and Soos have told us so much about you!”

Then Dipper was being hugged, forced to drop his bags to return the gesture. “That's, uh, great! How do you know Soos exactly?”

She pulled back and said, “Ah! Great nephew.”

“Really?” She didn't look to be that old. In fact, she looked miraculously youthful for someone who had great nephews.

“She ages well,” came the deep voice from before. Looking over at the counter, there was an older man sitting behind the reception desk with his head in his hand. He, too, was Hispanic and had an impressive fu manchu and beard with thick eyebrows to match. He looked like an ex-biker, and Dipper didn't know whether to appreciate how well the voice matched the face or be afraid.

The woman rolled her eyes and gestured to the man. “Dipper, I'd like you to meet my husband Xibalba.”

“Call me Xi. It's easier for people to pronounce for some reason.”

Dipper was growing steadily terrified of witnessing a domestic as the woman's eye began to twitch. “Don't take anything he says personally. He does not hate you.”

“That would be silly. Saying I hate just you,” Xi grumbled. Then he uttered, “I hate everyone.”

Yes, Dipper was certain he was about to witness a fight. Then the woman surprised him by taking a deep breath and managing to rein in her temper. “I am Lara Muerte. Please,” she touched her chest, “call me Lara.” She walked over to her husband, then pulled him out of the chair he was in. He appeared disgruntled, but quickly changed his expression so she wouldn't lambast him again. “You just missed Wendy. She's out and about early this morning, so Xi will show you to your room. I would do it, but our usual receptionist is at the radio station currently and you already experienced how Xi greets people at the door.”

Dipper nodded, picking up his bags quickly. He wasn't so sure he wanted to be led around by someone as ill-tempered as Xi, but he trusted Lara. She would probably guess the culprit should he disappear randomly on the way to his room. He hoped at least. Now he was actually sweating from nervousness.

Xi led him down the hall past a pair of individuals discussing something scientific. He wasn't sure what, but it apparently involved robotics. As they passed the tall woman in white and shorter dark-skinned man (Jesus, how many curls could one head of hair need?), Xi uttered, “That's Carlos and Glados. If I were you, I would avoid Glados. She's antisocial at best and homicidal at worst. We're pretty sure she doesn't even like the people she's living with.”

“And Carlos?” Dipper asked.

“Nice guy. Got a nutjob for a boyfriend, the usual receptionist. But for a nutjob, he's pretty welcoming. Guess that's why Lara gave him the position.” They made it to an elevator, where Xi pushed the button and they waited. “Carlos is also a nephew.”

“Good to know,” Dipper said, casting his eyes down.

“I like Soos. He's pretty handy when he visits,” Xi admitted. Dipper was about to point out that Xi said he hated everyone when the older man said, “Don't tell Lara I said that. She'll think I'm mellowing out and make me receptionist more often.” He rubbed his face as the elevator doors open. “God, I hate mornings.”

“Night person?” Dipper asked as they stepped on.

Xi snorted. “Yeah. I run the bar next door.” Dipper nodded. 

When they got off the elevator, Xi immediately pulled Dipper to the side. He was about to panic and ask why when suddenly a man about Dipper's age with white hair and almost ethereal blue eyes came running to the elevator with a bag slung over his shoulder. “Thanks Xi!” the man cried right before the elevator doors closed.

Xi didn't answer. He just uttered, “That happens every morning just about. Kid stays up late with the night owl boyfriend, then has to run to get to work on time.”

“Sounds exhausting,” Dipper claimed. “Not sure even I have that energy.”

“Well,” Xi said, “few do. Jack is a walking miracle most days. Wait till you meet his partner. Terrifying guy.”

“Does everyone in the complex hang out or something?” Dipper asked as they proceeded down the hall. Xi seemed to know just about everything about everyone for someone who disliked people.

“It's a small place, and Lara insists on serving brunch in my pub every Sunday. Food's wonderful, and everyone gets to socialize. She thinks it's fun.”

“You don't?”

Xi quirked an eyebrow. “What do you think?” They walked for a while, then Xi gestured upward to the ceiling and said, “You'll find it interesting, I'm sure. Two professors that teach at the college Wendy attends—you too, right?—live upstairs. History professor and an archeology one.”

“That's kind of unnerving, actually,” Dipper admitted. He didn't know any professors as of yet, and to be so close to some already sort of gave him anxiety.

Xi chuckled at his nervousness. “No pressure to succeed, right?” They stopped at a room and Xi took a key from his pocket and handed it to Dipper. “Guess this is yours now.”

Dipper set down a bag to take the key. He stared at it for a moment. “Yeah. Guess so.”

“If you have any questions, don't be afraid to ask my wife. Anyone but me.”

Xi was about to turn and walk away when the door to the room behind him and Dipper creaked open. A literal chill ran up Dipper's spine before he turned to see a completely darkened room and a man standing in the doorway. The man wore an eye patch and a toothy grin, still in his pajamas as he leaned against his door frame. He gave Xi an inquisitive, almost creepy look as he half whispered half purred, “Is that a new tenant?” Dipper didn't know why, but something about the man across the hall made him want to run away all over again.

Xi was not as affected. He was annoyed, but not intimidated as Dipper was. It was only right, he supposed. So far, Xi was the tallest person in the building. No one intimidated him, most likely. “I was so hoping you wouldn't be awake at this hour,” he growled at the man.

“I smelled company,” the man purred in response.

Xi rolled his eyes. “Go back inside, keep the lights off, and sleep off the rest of your life.”

“You're not even gonna introduce me?”

“No.” The man slid back into his room, waving discreetly at Dipper. Yes, if Dipper didn't run now he would certainly do so if he ever saw that man again. When the door finally closed, Xi let out a long sigh. “That's Bill. Avoid him. At all costs.”

“Do I even want to know why?” Dipper asked.

“No. Just know that he's trouble for anyone who interacts with him.”

Dipper believed him without question. Still, he had to ask, “Is there a specific reason to avoid him?”

“We're pretty sure he's Satan,” Xi replied. “Have fun getting settled.”

“Thanks.” And then Dipper was alone. Unlocking the door as quickly as possible, he dragged his bags in before Bill could emerge again. Looking around the apartment, he was finally able to breathe easily. Looking down at the key in his hand, he smiled. He was out of the house. He was on his own for the most part. On his own in the world.

While still frightened by the prospect, he had the thought that he was going to be okay. It was the most pleasant thought he'd had since he'd arrived.

**Author's Note:**

> So I put all my OTPs and OT3s in a room and told them to play. This is a result.


End file.
